L. A. Phroaig (laphroaig_neat)

As a manager you will also be able to control gravity. Sir Isaac Newton showed that dense objects, such as managers, have more gravity. Your office will become a black hole into which all employee input will be lost forever. No matter how many times your employees give you something - diskettes, documents, whatever - you can claim you never got it. Best of all, it's not your fault; it's the law of gravity.