Meep (meeeep)

Race #1220

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Official speed 117.83 wpm (38.19 seconds elapsed during race)
Race Start April 28, 2018 2:38:34am UTC
Race Finish April 28, 2018 2:39:12am UTC
Outcome Win (1 of 5)
Opponents 3. zero_ortho (93.27 wpm)
5. bucklingspring (87.14 wpm)
Accuracy 100.0%
Points 145.33
Text #3640517 (Length: 375 characters)

The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom, I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you to go for a phony fever, but if you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office. You fake a stomach cramp, when you're bent over wailing, you lick your palms. It's childish and stupid, but then, so is high school.