too weak too slow (ryli)

Right, I am going to tell you how this works. You're going in the drink and I am going to make a cup of tea. Underneath the floor boards is the famous river Thames. I hope for your sakes you can hold your breath for as long as it takes to boil that kettle. After that, I am going to ask you a question, one question. You are going to give me a name and if it's the right name, I send you home warm and dry in a fresh set of clothes. If it's the wrong name, you'll be fed to the crayfish.