I (excelsiate)

Race #2826

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Official speed 90.59 wpm (62.52 seconds elapsed during race)
Race Start September 23, 2020 7:50:01pm UTC
Race Finish September 23, 2020 7:51:04pm UTC
Outcome Win (1 of 5)
Accuracy 98.0%
Points 135.89
Text #3641263 (Length: 472 characters)

Oh, you're right it's sarcasm! A few weeks ago, I was happily retired, sulking by my swimming pool, and my psychotic best friend shows up out of nowhere to torture me over mistakes I made, honest mistakes I made over a decade ago! We, our little posse, are flat broke, but hey, let's go out and spend two million dollars on a tandem rotor chopper, so I can go steal nerve gas from terrorists! Forgive me, but sarcasm is all I've got! Sarcasm, and a room full of you fools!